‘I’ Column - Skywalker

... on how sexual rights affect one personally, and how they are affirmed and/or violated in one's local cultural setting.

am a transgendered person. That is what I have been told by rights activist and in medical terms. But a ‘normal’ person will say that I’m crazy because in their world there is no such thing. To be honest, I don’t know what I am. I know I’m human, I have a female body but my brain and my consciousness say that I’m a male. I am more comfortable being a male which comes to me naturally. I do not force myself to feel or think this way. It has always been like this ever since I can remember.

In medical terms I’m suffering from ‘gender dysphoria’ and the only way to ‘cure’ me is through sex reassignment surgery along with hormone therapy. Even though this does not ‘cure’ my sickness hundred percent it’s the closest I can get to being ‘cured’.

It has been said that sexual rights are fundamental and universal rights. Sexual rights have become a major issue in today’s world. This is mainly because governments, religions and cultures have imposed a lot of restrictions and barriers on the sexual behaviour of human beings. I think it should not be anybody else’s business. As long as an individual is not forcing or harming another person to satisfy his or her sexual needs or is not using adolescents and children, everybody else should keep out of other peoples’ sexual lives because it is a very private matter.

For a person like me who has a major issue in accepting the body that I was born with, sexuality is another confusing matter. Sexual needs are bodily needs but if a person is not comfortable with his or her own body how can that person satisfy a body that they refuse? If a person has undergone a sex reassignment surgery and if that person is happy with his or her new rearranged body then that person can pursue his or her sexual needs without much hesitation.

Finding a partner is not that easy for some one like me. Straight women are attracted to men but I’m not totally a man. Lesbians are attracted to women but I’m not a woman. Bisexuals are attracted to males and females but I’m neither. This does not mean that it is impossible to find some one understanding. Friends just like me are living a happy life with their partners.

There are many other issues that I worry about every single day. One of the major issues is finding employment. My appearance happens to be a ‘BIG PROBLEM’ to many employers. It does not matter if I qualify for the job or if I’m a hard worker or not. Appearance is the most important thing for them. They do not want to think for a second that this person has applied for this particular job because he or she wants to make a living. May be they think people like us are not supposed to live. My sexual rights haven’t been violated by any one else but me. I do it because I need to live first then only can I think of other needs in my life.

Skywalker is a pseudonym.