A digital magazine on sexuality, based in the Global South: We are working towards cultivating safe, inclusive, and self-affirming spaces in which all individuals can express themselves without fear, judgement or shame
Sexual violence is a global pandemic affecting one in three women at least once in their lifetime. The statistics in India are equally shocking. National Crime Records Bureau statistics of 2014 indicate that a rape occurs every 20 minutes in India.
During my interaction with students as a part of sexuality education classes in schools, one frequently asked question by boys is,“How to charm a girl?”
I have always loved the Internet. Its potential to provide information and connect people has always amazed and enthralled me. Hence, I decided to look at how queer women in India, lesbian and bisexual women in particular, use the Internet to meet other queer women. I looked at three dating sites in particular, PinkSofa, OKCupid and Mingle2, apart from the usual social media sites.
In Peshawar alone, the community consists of over 500 transgenders. At least 20 per cent of these have AIDS. Their risk of contracting AIDS is higher, since 59 per cent of khawaja saras report to have at least one sexually transmitted infection.
Representation is a tricky thing, especially when it comes to portraying minorities. It is easy to stereotype and feed into the popular image of minorities. Gay men as fashion designers or hairstylists desperate to be friends with straight women are a rather common trope. It makes gay men visible but on heterosexual terms. It takes away any individuality from the gay man; he merely survives to seek affirmation from the straight people in his life.
How should I walk, what should my gait be like, what kind of clothes can I wear that will sort of cover me up…? This indecisiveness and the burden of, “What will others think?” are some of the worries, that I carried for a long time while making decisions like: “Is this going to expose too much skin?”, “Is this going to look a certain way that I may not like to present myself as?”
It is unfortunate that one of the most fundamental processes of human life is shunned to the extent that we’ve been taught, and so we learn to dismiss the natural feelings our bodies produce.
While pop culture will continue to exist in the mainstream, it also provides us the scope to create alternative narratives and/ or counter-narratives that question, challenge and unpack the existing stereotypes and norms.