Here is the fourth micro piece in the series Quick Bytes, one of our new features at In Plainspeak. We continue to connect our readers and writers to each other in as many different ways as possible. Our intention is to expand the space of safety, inclusion, and a self-affirming approach, that illuminates the wealth of diversity, and possibilities, that we represent together.
Quick Bytes is based on short responses to cue questions that we ask those who agree to participate in this micro feature.
Soumya Mishra gives us Quick Bytes on Workplaces and Sexuality.
Soumya says:
One line to describe me: I’m a researcher and writer turned development sector professional and community builder.
The word Sexuality brings to mind: Sexuality is fluid, embodying my emotions, and their expression, thereby creating an aspect of my identity central to me. The idea of gender, sexuality and neuro-cognitive functioning are inextricably linked in my neuroqueer brain. One can’t be separated from the other. Neuroqueerness, which entails both queering of the body and mind, defies fixed definitions. It means disrupting and liberating myself to be whoever I want to be – a unique star, without being restricted to labels and stereotypes in a predominantly cis-heteronormative and neuronormative world.
I connect workplaces and sexuality in these ways: Sexuality goes beyond sexual activity. It encompasses our feelings, experiences and desires, developing the idea of self, and how that manifests and interacts with the world. We ought to feel equally safe bringing this sense of personhood to the workplace like everyone else. Non-traditional forms of companionship shouldn’t be treated with disdain or seen through a lens of perversion.
Our lives aren’t siloed. Often, co-workers bond through the sharing of personal experiences. Imagine having to hide an integral part of ourselves when others can share freely without judgment. Inclusion and belongingness can’t be ensured if certain experiences are invisibilised.
Self-affirming in this context for me: When neuroqueer relationships, friendships and companionships are misunderstood and mistreated, it exacerbates mental health challenges for us. So it would be self-affirming when I feel safe and free to exercise my agency and to make choices even if they are considered unconventional. Though in all honesty, I just feel they are equally valid albeit different choices.
Having experienced this closely, one of the key motivations behind my work at EquiLead is to help create and facilitate spaces where people, especially those from the margins, feel heard and included. This psychological safety enhances performance at the workplace, thus helping career growth.
Something to think about as a last word: Whenever you fall into the trap of creating binaries, think beyond. There are multiple lived experiences and truths. What I’ve learnt is that conflicts are bound to happen when we are navigating such complex realities and trauma, perhaps more so in feminist spaces. However, that’s where the work begins, so as to inspire care, understanding and inclusion. This is a collective responsibility, not an individual one.
Put together by Shikha Aleya.
Cover Image: Photo courtesy of Soumya Mishra.
